So I'm sure you've been in a bar or club, and seen a really hot girl that you wanted to approach.
What you wanted to do was to just walk up smoothly, say something really cool that she was impressed by, and have her being captivated by you for the rest of the night.
However, instead of approaching her, you did - precisely nothing.
You stood there and thought about what you should say. Desperately trying to micromanage the conversation in your own head.
What would she do if I said this?
How will she respond? What do I then say?
And so on.
If you were to then approach her at this point, chances are it will come off as contrived and awkward. Why?
The reason - instead of being natural, you are trying to force the situation and her reaction.
One thing that women really hate is when guys are incongruent. These means that what comes out of their mouth is not aligned with their body language.
Ever seen a guy acting like he is Mr Confident? All loud and brash? Yet underneath you know he is just trying too hard, because his body language betrays him?
This kind of misaligned behaviour is what causes girls to label certain guys as creepy. It's where what the guy says is not in alignment with his body language.
Best to be totally open about where you're at.
If you're not feeling totally confident - it's ok to say that! A lot of women find it attractive when a man can be vulnerable, but own his own vulnerability.
So if you're feeling nervous and awkward - just say it. But don't look for her sympathy or approval - just say it in a 'this is where I'm at in this moment' kind of way.
This shows real strength. It shows a man who is not hiding anything or trying to be something he is not.
This is so different from the normal guys who approach her - either those super loud fratboy in the club types, or shy 'nice' guys who bore her silly.
So try it out!
What you wanted to do was to just walk up smoothly, say something really cool that she was impressed by, and have her being captivated by you for the rest of the night.
However, instead of approaching her, you did - precisely nothing.
You stood there and thought about what you should say. Desperately trying to micromanage the conversation in your own head.
What would she do if I said this?
How will she respond? What do I then say?
And so on.
If you were to then approach her at this point, chances are it will come off as contrived and awkward. Why?
The reason - instead of being natural, you are trying to force the situation and her reaction.
One thing that women really hate is when guys are incongruent. These means that what comes out of their mouth is not aligned with their body language.
Ever seen a guy acting like he is Mr Confident? All loud and brash? Yet underneath you know he is just trying too hard, because his body language betrays him?
This kind of misaligned behaviour is what causes girls to label certain guys as creepy. It's where what the guy says is not in alignment with his body language.
Best to be totally open about where you're at.
If you're not feeling totally confident - it's ok to say that! A lot of women find it attractive when a man can be vulnerable, but own his own vulnerability.
So if you're feeling nervous and awkward - just say it. But don't look for her sympathy or approval - just say it in a 'this is where I'm at in this moment' kind of way.
This shows real strength. It shows a man who is not hiding anything or trying to be something he is not.
This is so different from the normal guys who approach her - either those super loud fratboy in the club types, or shy 'nice' guys who bore her silly.
So try it out!
About the Author:
Chadd Pfannenstein is a battle hardened dude who has spent the last years tirelessly putting into action every attraction system out there to see what works and what doesn't. He is now here to show you how to pickup women simply by learning how to approach hot girls.
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