Most people think about getting wed sometime from the time they are very young. The problem with most of those thoughts is that the romantic expectations set by films and books simply isn't the way of real life. It's simple to become dissatisfied in long-term commitments. Often you can't even qualify it, but finish up blaming it on your other half, which in its turn causes stress in the family.
Folks may idealistically hope that somehow marriage will fill a void in their life, lift the loneliness and marvellously make a 'happily ever after ' scenario. They forget that all folks have issues, and all relationships need continuing maintenance to survive not to mention find contentment. No single person can be the end-all and be all that turns your life into a fairy tale; one individual can never meet another's complete wants. The earlier folk understand this in any commitment, the more well off they'll be.
A good marriage is where both folks are people along with having a third entity (being a pair). A truly healthy marriage is one in which people have past-times and activities apart from one another to support the individual, as well as mutual activities that improve bonding and foster relationship building. Just saying 'I do ' does not create a solid relationship. That's only the beginning of continuing time and energy invested in the 'couple'. You can love each other fearlessly and still have a marriage fail for absence of upkeep and attention.
Another component of a pragmatic marriage is one in which both folk agree on the most important parts of their life, for example faith and values. If two folks are far apart on such fragile subjects, it is very likely to cause a large amount of troubles going forward. Competition over elementary things like chores also drives a wedge into a marriage. The accountability game doesn't work and no one wins. Life is just not fair, and life frequently causes disequilibria in family life. This is when that, as partners, both people just pick up the mess, clean up the matter and push on.
Hint: never go into marriage thinking that you will change your other half over a period. No one can force another person to transform. Insisting upon change can basically harm your relationship. Walk into your marriage accepting your partner as they are, not as some image which will never develop. If you can't do that, you might want to revisit your reasons for getting wed.
Keeping your marriage resolutely footed in fact may seem dull compared against the vision of whimsical marriages, romantic dinners and running into each other's arms. Nonetheless, having that grounding finally stabilizes your marriage.
Folks may idealistically hope that somehow marriage will fill a void in their life, lift the loneliness and marvellously make a 'happily ever after ' scenario. They forget that all folks have issues, and all relationships need continuing maintenance to survive not to mention find contentment. No single person can be the end-all and be all that turns your life into a fairy tale; one individual can never meet another's complete wants. The earlier folk understand this in any commitment, the more well off they'll be.
A good marriage is where both folks are people along with having a third entity (being a pair). A truly healthy marriage is one in which people have past-times and activities apart from one another to support the individual, as well as mutual activities that improve bonding and foster relationship building. Just saying 'I do ' does not create a solid relationship. That's only the beginning of continuing time and energy invested in the 'couple'. You can love each other fearlessly and still have a marriage fail for absence of upkeep and attention.
Another component of a pragmatic marriage is one in which both folk agree on the most important parts of their life, for example faith and values. If two folks are far apart on such fragile subjects, it is very likely to cause a large amount of troubles going forward. Competition over elementary things like chores also drives a wedge into a marriage. The accountability game doesn't work and no one wins. Life is just not fair, and life frequently causes disequilibria in family life. This is when that, as partners, both people just pick up the mess, clean up the matter and push on.
Hint: never go into marriage thinking that you will change your other half over a period. No one can force another person to transform. Insisting upon change can basically harm your relationship. Walk into your marriage accepting your partner as they are, not as some image which will never develop. If you can't do that, you might want to revisit your reasons for getting wed.
Keeping your marriage resolutely footed in fact may seem dull compared against the vision of whimsical marriages, romantic dinners and running into each other's arms. Nonetheless, having that grounding finally stabilizes your marriage.
About the Author:
CJ Cutrone is the founder of Word and Spirit Ministries, a charity that offers marriage counseling information, online sermons and a haven for Peru kids.
No comments:
Post a Comment